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The tooth thingy

We had a significant event – the little man pulled out his first tooth. Yes, he had to do it with no other than the very first. Me at office, father at home and that was probably the only day when it was decided that he will not be sent to school ….simply! Little did we know that would lead to maybe some boredom and of course a significant step much in advance than its natural time to strike! 

Me entering a meeting, getting a message from the paranoid and sometimes alarming father that “Panu pulled out his tooth, half tooth is still inside and there is alot of bleeding!” Well that did it and I rushed to see my lil champ and his grandmother with visibility paranoid father waiting in the parking and no blood anywhere! Thankfully nothing was left behind, he did a good job in all things destructive so this is so exception.

All’s well that ends well…. right 🙂 Can’t imagine how Diyu is going to treat us knowing how she pushes her own envelope! Lord bless us.

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Cut to second one – “Bridget yeh jo hum kha raha hai bahut hard hai. Chew nahi ho raha hai…. ” Our man was chewing on his own tooth 🙂

I guess we just need to get ready for a different story with each tooth ? Oh help us Lord 🙂

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As time passes by…

It’s been a while, a long long while and much has happened. Our world has changed, bettered, expanded and so much more. Ananya is in our lives for what feels like a long time. She entered and made us parents again. Made us better parents! It’s hard to describe how things have become so much more deeper and with so much more meaning with these little feet entering lives. Kabir has changed, he is a big, sometimes responsible brother, but brother nonetheless. I have a full house now, with noise that’s so sweet that sometimes oh, sometimes silences would be great. Our being feels together, with more purpose and clarity that I now understand what it is to let go…. 

Letting go……….yet feeling secure is how I can summarize the last 1.5 years or so. Its an awakening of sorts, sometimes rocky but most times easy. When I look back and think of how our lives have evolved, it simply makes me take a beautiful, contended breadth and just smile with a feeling of comfortably “being”. 

And now, I have updates, many many updates that probably won’t be written down in this one session but they are all in head. They need this space to capture for my fading memory as I want to feel that sense of nostalgia with a smile again. 

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Panu’s 4th birthday and a significant welcome gathering

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Our little baby – all set for the party

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For our “Betu” on his special day with glimpses below of what turned out to a disaster of a cake, a lovely gathering, and us – as always! 

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And today….

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with more to come 🙂 

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Until words find me again…

I find my self struggling to write nowadays! It is not as if things are not happening, or there are new things we experience and I should keep… it is all of this, yet, I am struggling… So I leave myself pictures and notes on them which I don’t want my fading memory to forget. Until words find me again…. There is a new craze in this house… or may I say, there are two new crazes – golf (which I don’t have a picture off) and grilling.  I happened to gift Hanu a grill on our anniversary and trust me, nothing takes over our weekend than getting the fish/prawn/chicken ready and marinated, the fire burning with camphor, petrol, coal, paper, wood…(so we get the picture) and ready to grill. As I write this, my entire family has gone our on a rainy Sunday evening in search of coal. So you see, anything that is done is either done in totality or not at all… This one is in totality. But hey, who is complaining, I get the most awesome grills every weekend in the comfort of my own home.  Now coming to Golf. Its Hanu alone. The man has passion for everything he does. Something I admire and lack in myself. So we have two golf sets at home, shoes to match, caps to match and many balls along with rungs that have almost become tatters in the house. Why? Because our man likes to practice. I am sure to write more about it in the future. Just to add the awww factor: Panu to his betu “Betu, you no place the golf course!” Translated to normal language “Papa, stop practicing at home with your golf stick” Happy 6th Anniversary to us! There is a reason why I have put this particular picture. Its us and only us! But when we are there he can’t be far away…. right! He is there somewhere in the background. Represented by his dahi chawal, which we obviously have done a lousy job to finish and given up after trying the nth time. Its a moment we take for ourselves, without being his parents, but being what ever we are for each other. It is needless to say, that it has been an amazing 11 years together. As time passes by and I look through old snaps, and the newer ones, I notice that this hasn’t changed. the glee in our eyes, the togetherness, the love, the warmth… it is still US, as it always will be. (With the little ones around!) My Ma! The one constant always… There are no words for her, except, I love the way she radiates in everything she does.  The perfect harmony.  Have a hap, hap, happy diwali! May good luck and cheer be yours all the year!  The edited version customized by nanta for panu took a life of itself! It is a beautiful adaptation. 

I guess words did find me… after all with a little help!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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From here and there…

A few days ago I was sitting with Panu and actually showing him his homework (!) while he was on his potty, doing his thing. Now I am used to him asking me in the most adorable voice “what iis this Mamma?”… to which we have to promptly reply else that continues! So this morning, I was expecting the same.

So there is mamma asking him “baba, what is this?”,  but the baba turns around and tells mamma “I don’t know!”

So we have started conversations my love… I am amazed at the things the little phartu is saying now a days. It’s like it was all there and now it is just pouring out. I can’t help but just smile a serene smile and wait for what next.

So here’s a few of them

Where’s the betu?

The Johnny uncle is gone to the Mysore and then London — 

Travelers of phirang origin with whom my son fell in love with. There was a Ruth as well… God Bless her! She made the journey easy. So we still talk about them, even after almost a month!

The granny has gone to the market to buy a flying carpet, from a man in Istanbul (!) 

To clarify this is a line our man has picked up from his current favorite book. I think he will one day mug up a book for sure or this quality is going to save him later in life – An early prediction i.e.

This is a nice song Mamma – To my horror it is Ms. Katrina Kaif grinding to some number I have already forgotten!

Aaj mausam bada baiman hai…. aaj mausam! – Followed by almost the full song with full blown emotions and facial expressions! Only hand movement and heroine is missing I would say, along with sometimes the mausam.

We’ll go to the baga beach – Any beach is now baga beach, such is the impact of Goa. We are sure to buy a house there for … just!

Nightly maska to God via a pray that father has inculcated. – Best prayer ever, has bought me back also

No, no and no – It’s his favourite words, if I may say so

We go to, go to where mamma? – Aww… I want to eat him up then, but it’s 50% of the time when he knows its school but trying to evade the eventuality of the situation (I tell myself – This too shall pass…)

Matter, Flyn, Guido, Kung Fu Panda (!), Jungle Jamboree, Rabba, Aaj Mausam, etc…. it is certainly kill us with repetition. My son, as proud as I am of him cannot focus or like two things at a time. He likes one and shoves it down our throat until we can’t stop humming it or loving it. Do we have a choice after all!

Mummy ke paas jaana hai – It has come back to me with full force. Me to GOD – “ I understand I was in the wrong – please forgive me and lift this already”

Cars, cars, and only cars –  I am sure this obsession is not going to stop soon. The boy has started showing interest in cooking shows!

Need I write more..

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In awe… I will remain

When I didn’t have babies (actual a baby!) I wasn’t a very child friendly person! Sure, I liked to look at them and saw “aww, so cute!”, but I didn’t know what else to say or how else to carry on a conversation with a tiny one.  I would keep telling myself, how in the world would I ever carry out a conversation when I have a tiny one. Little did I know the hormone changes would change this fundamental thing also… I can talk nineteen to a dozen now, challenge children without offending them, laugh with them, play with them and so much more. I think children have an amazing way of opening your heart and mind. Mine feels so open after Panu.

I have always been some one who is cautious, careful about making the first move even in a conversation. But when this little puttu has arrived, I find myself just talking to anyone. I think it is wonderful.

In awe I will remain towards how much he has changed our lives for the better, it is because of him that I stop and smell the roses, find each and everything beautiful. A simple pleasure like just rolling on the floor or making bubbles has taken on another dimension. Children are the gateway to heaven…. only on earth.

It’s really late at night, I have a smile on my face and I am pretty sure this post is not structured or maybe just will look peiced together! But I just felt like putting down how grateful I am that Panu is in our lives. He has taught us to go back to the things that matter the most and enjoy it, inhale it and simply make it a part of everything. I love these experiences because I end up learning/changing things about myself for the better….

My darling Panu, you are the light and will always remain. I have to write in a separate post of the wonderful things you say, do, sing (!), play and just be. It is like watching the sun rise everyday… different and beautiful and awe aspiring. I cannot thank you enough, my child, my extension but still your every own person…

I hope I have made sense…. I love you forever.

Your besotted Mamma

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The best things in life are…

  • The smile on my little boy’s face when I return home from work
  • The smile on his face when his betu comes home
  • Nights when he is in my arms fast asleep, yet moves a bit and says “mamma”
  • The smell of my baby’s breath and the warmth he exudes
  • Drives full of silences and smiles
  • The smell of rain – before and after!
  • Rain itself!
  • Burberry on hanu :):) (right from the days we couldn’t really afford a bottle!)
  • Chicken Stew and prawn curry!
  • Cuddle and family kissi time … yeah!
  • Driving…. home
  • Music on phone – that’s god sent!
  • A good fitting pair of jeans when you finally find one
  • Silver earrings
  • Hanu’s prawn curry…….yum!
  • Ma’s tomato egg and chicken bhunny
  • Fridays and Saturdays!
  • Old photos and memories
  • Jhonson’s baby products —- all of them!
  • A drink of water
  • Old friends chatting up after a long time
  • Flowers
  • Holding hands….. always
Life’s good…

My monkeys

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Fabia……….fab fab :)

The Fabia has ultimately arrived and all that I can say is smooooooootttttttttttttthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 😉

It was such a different way or feeling of picking up this car vs. Airy 5 years back. Different and nice because we had the little master with us going beserk with his favourite thing – CARS and that too in abundance. So while the father went about clearing paper work, the small wonder went about opening doors, to circling steering wheels, to charming the pants off all the sales folks at the showroom. He went on saying “Kiska car, nahi Fabia car hai”  and we repeated “Panu ka, aur kiska” 🙂

It was a wonderful, nervous feeling… nervous because it’s a big step for us as a family and wonderful for obvious reasons… Driving it around the town for the first time, I think I was more nervous. But I am sure this too will soothe soon. We zipped it off for a long drive and I don’t think I have seen Hanu this happy ever in a car… he looked so at peace.

So here’s to many long drives, stories, experiences, feelings, adventures, road trips and nooks waiting for us to disover with the FABIA.

The pose never changes 🙂